12/16/2003 - 1:30 a.m. | oh, the camraderie

I don't feel there's even enough to make an entry here, but I feel obligated to try. Look! I'm expressing my feelings!! Up at 1, groggily drive Kyle to his final, shower, out to tan and pick up medication, watch cartoons, go to work. Desperately try to fill up final hours at Kenney, fail. Home to watch Tommy Boy and eat Cheetos Puffs with Brytne. She got me a fondue set for Christmas, but unfortunately I have nothing to fondue at the moment (also the roof of my mouth was burning from the cheese wads). When Kyle returns from final, we go to Steak 'n' Shake. Rentertainment, then back here to watch our pick: The Erotic Misadventures of the Invisible Man. Now there is a movie, my friends! Softcore porn of women humping the air and the occasional CGI alteration so it appears as though a nipple is being jostled! You know it's bad when you want to fast-forward through the "sex" scenes to get back to the plot. By the way, is it weird that we watched this? I vote no because I got nothing even resembling an erection, and I can't even say that about "That's So Raven." I KEED, I KEED! Incidentally, I think I could be a brilliant writer/director as far as pornography goes. And think of the prestige! I have vision, I tell you. Vision! OK - alone again, naturally. Spritz bought me a package of 50 matchbooks out of the blue. I assume this is my Christmas present, and that's damn good by my book. Temptation flares, however. "What would 1,000 matches look like burning simultaneously?" Then I notice the Zippo fluid sitting nearby. Potentially my last entry.

OK, anticlimactic. Spritz gave that a shot, then watched last year's video in its entirety. Realizations:

a.) I miss last year. A lot.
b.) We need to film more this year (and so camera is now by my side most of the time)
c.) Everything I say or do on camera is retarded. Also, I am supergross. Avoid speaking.

That finished, we wandered over to Dank's to make him not sleep and watch Nick. Spritz didn't seem to get the charm of it, but I cannot really blame him. By the way, I am giving up any wish I should be entitled to (e.g. birthday candles, shooting stars, that stupid 11:11 thing) to try and achieve one ultimate superpower: The ability to travel back in time and take over the bodies of the contestants on "Nick Arcade." Oh, the mischief I would cause! Kids would be shitting themselves and giving hot, hot blowjobs on a nightly basis. All for you, Mongo. All for you.