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� 05/20/2003 - 10:03 p.m. | nate is an ass tonite (sorry) Stats, as necessary:
Hours worked: 6.5 OK, apparently there is this rumor at the factory that I love to weld. Let me correct this: I hate to weld. Please stop trying to make me do it. Thank you. Anyway, apparently sleeping 'til 9 is beyond me, so I woke up at 8:30 to watch VH1 and eat Cheerios. Man, I need 43's like a druggie needs a FIX. I was actually very perky this morning. Hmm - I'm usually perky on both sides of work, and then it just ends somewhere in the middle there. Mystery. The drive to-and-from work was terrible, radiowise. It's only the second day? Hoo boy. I am the only non-inept person working at that factory right now. This is not good. Snake King is trying to give orders, and I don't want to correct him because he'll think I'm uppity or something, but I'm like ten steps ahead of him on everything ("I should prolly go work on half-moons until he catches up..." *pause* "You should probably go work on half-circles until I catch up" - he never knows the name of anything... WTF is a "wire machine?!"), and yet he still explains to me the delivery schedule as though I really care about anything besides making over $10 an hour (hint: I don't). More half-moons this morning, and then he tried to teach me how to wind bundles of string. I surpassed him within seconds (the learning curve existed only because of his inability to teach). Just let me be summer manager. I'm smarter than all of you. Anyway, I really enjoyed the bundles of string, mostly because it was a task where manual dexterity - and not smashing force - is an asset. Unfortunately, I was kicked off that to weld. For 6 hours (theoretically). This is not balanced at all. I can't weld that long. At around 2, I took lunch. Snake King entered (as I knew he would, but I plead ignorance just so I can see the hilarity). He tried to explain the importance of someone always running the "wire machine" and went on and on about some crazy alternating shift system with Doughboy and Travo. And again with the delivery schedule. Did you know that there is a shipment going out June 20th?! BECAUSE THERE IS! In short, I think he was trying to scold me for not finding a replacement welder while I ate, but he never got around to it because Tim came in. It was like a family reunion. They were both so happy. "WE ARE SUCH WASTES OF MONEY!!" I gulped down my orange pasta and returned to the welder. As it was my parents 25th anniversary and we were all going out to dinner, I knew it would be wise if I shot out of there early. And shoot out, I did (not in the way, innuendo pervert). 4:30, I sprinted out the side door and around to the front, leaping into my car and peeling off. Your little rotation system didn't account for me fleeing, now did it, Snakey?! Here's a thought: My dad got married when he a month younger than I am right now. I can't even fathom that. MARRIAGE?! NOW? I would be happy with a hug and a pat on the butt. Actually, I started planning my future as the embittered chain-smoking, surly, drunk, single King of the Hobos today. I will be a hit at family events. "No, I'm not gay!! I just can't attract women is all! Now come sit on Uncle Nathan's lap!" You just give me 10 years, and they'll be talking about wasted potential in no time. Someone has to lead the hobos, and I'm pretty sure it's me. Communism will work this time; it just needed more knife fights. What the hell are you talking about, Nate? Stop him, he's killing us! So, went out to fancy Italian place for dinner. I was feeling totally unexperimental, so I went with four cheese spinach ravioli. Exactly what I wanted. We discussed embarrasing wedding stories and crop circles and psychics. Apparently, I am very skeptical. Who knew? (Self-perception theory) Our waitress was distant, and they ran out of capers. Sounds like no tip to me. My parents disagreed. On the way home, I made my parents take me to Baskin-Robbins because I really wanted a waffle cone. This all changed when I noticed WOLVERINE'S BERRY RAMPAGE. I don't know about you, but I can't imagine berries rampaging being anything but adorable. Anyway, after the fiasco with the rainbow ice cream several years ago (not rainbow sherbet - this is important - rainbow ice cream... it looked so colorful and fun, but tasted like Froot Loops, sour milk, and ass - yes, I've had all three), I thought there was no way it couldn't be bad and ordered it. Soooo much fake berry - ice cream, sauce topping, gummies, Nerds. All fake berry flavored. It was surprisingly good - except the aftertaste burned of chemicals. I've been so busy writing this that I've scared everyone off. Oh, well - I had nothing important to say anyway. Hmmm - when have I? Tomorrow is my first real full day of work. I hope I get pseduoscolded by Snake King. "Oh! Due on the 20th of June, you say? Well, I shall try my best to rotate and such then!" Then I'll sit in the bathroom for 20 minutes. HAHAHA
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