10/12/2003 - 10:52 a.m. | intelli-strong is my new name

I always mean to muster the energy to bang out an entry each night, but of course I need some incentive for that, and I have just plumb run out of H right now. Shucks.

So, I honestly can't say I got much done at first. Spritz and I ate some white cheddar mac and cheese, which is just transcendent (no lie). Then I spent a couple hours doing something to my diary or something - I can't really explain it because nothing looks different, but I am sure that is where my time got sucked up. Hm. Anyway, about that time I finally worked up the nerve to shower, and then Gautam (you might remember him as the useless Ad Boy from RYE? I don't think he remembers me, luckily) came by to pick up Spritz and me. We hit the mall, and I was on a very deadly mission. Pants.

Somehow, in the space of 24 hours, I managed to ruin 2 pairs of jeans. One I got dye on (retard); the other got ripped to hell when Kyle and I wrestled (um, still retard). Anyway, I decided all of a sudden that I was sick of ill-fitting jeans, and I was sure as hell gonna find a pair that actually fit me. Unfortunately, I am a 28 X 32, and nobody seems to acknowledge that as a probable size. "Why, a person would have to be some sort of mutant to wear those!" Thank you. Anyway, I looked in pretty much every store in the mall, even the ones I would not normally touch with a ten foot pole (hey! there's a clich�!), and I could still not find shit. Finally, tucked way back in the corner, I found the Buckle, and for some reason, they have my size in spades. And, even more fortunately, they were having a 50% off sale on the jeans I was getting, so I got 2 pairs for $40. Nice.

Actually, I liked a lot of the stuff they had there. I am still floating about as far as what I want to wear and stuff, but I'm leaning towards more brown. My parents might be coming down next weekend, and since they admitted they did not really get me anything much for my birthday, I might supplement my wardrobe a bit, as lame as that sounds. There's a jacket I sort of like (despite the shoulder thingies), and I really want some white Adidas with black stripes (although if I could fast-forward about 5 months to when they are worn in, that'd be great), and the Buckle had a bunch of really cool digital/analog watches that showed the time in analog but had cool effects (color-changing and dancin' stickmen namely). Anyway, it seems I've become some sort of a consumer, which annoys me. Actually, maybe not. I still buy plenty of stupid shit; I just do it on my own. I make my parents buy me anything responsible.

Anyway, this has long passed boring, and now you are all comatose, so let's move on. After the mall, we a) listened to Missy Elliott (whom I keep forgetting I like so much) and b) hit the World Harvest food place. I tried some "eh" dark chocolate and some all right strawberry pocky as well as FRUITS�CALPIS, which is code for "watered-down orange juice" (damn you, Asia!) and Thum's Up soda, which I just read about in a story about prostitues. It reminded me of, like, Prune Coke. Hmm. Shoulda gone with Spritz's pomegranate juice.

Some time passed at home. I read or sat or whatever. Status quo. Nessers called, and we talked some. Spritz called me Pacey, even though Kyle is obviously Pacey, making me Jack. Shoot. Kyle and I picked up Allen and Kitty, met Brytne at McDonald's (Double cheeseburgers for a buck?! That's pretty great, as long as you ignore the fact that McDonald's is shit terrible. In other news, Allen is now a vegetarian. My theory is that he didn't think he was emo enough and had to find something he could whine about, namely that few places serve vegetarian fare), and then we all went to the theatre to see Kill Bill.

I will try not to exaggerate here, but this was one of the best movies ever. Tarantino is a genius. It's like he took the action movie, tore it down to its purest essence, and then improved on the formula from there. What a movie! It was both a parody and an homage, and somehow he just gets it to work perfectly. The stuff that looks fake on purpose, the intentiona cheesiness at times, the disjointed story-telling - it all just comes together in this amazing wad of movie. I could never do something so good in my lifetime.

After that, we headed back here and more or less waited for Spritz to get ready so we could go the party at Will and Steve's frat. This, of course, took a long time, but we did eventually make it out. The walk over was kind of icky, as the weather had decided to do a 180 in the time we had been inside, so that it was now drizzly and cold. Anyway, we got there, and we were on the list (I've never been on a list before), so we got in no problem.

Hmm. Was I uncomfortable? I don't think so. I mean... there were lots of people all mashing together, and it... didn't freak me out. This is not to say that things were perfect, by any means. I am still horrid at approaching people, even if it just to dance, because I am sure they think I am an annoying idiot, but the overall environment was... fine. I'm so confused. I dunno - I even preferred it to smaller parties because I wasn't expected to even try and talk. I could just dance and blob in with the crowd. I tried to leave Spritz and Brytne to their own affairs because I don't want to be a bother like that, but Brytne did try to use me as her substitute Kyle ("Will you carry my glasses?" "Hold my beer?"), and I would say the scales are a little unbalanced. I was probably around too much. :( Anyway, I pretty much danced with myself, because I wasn't going to ask anybody, and they sure as hell weren't going to ask me, and I suppose that's sort of lame, but I was just so happy with my improvement that I wasn't too bothered. I much prefer dancing as an awkward cover-up to, say, drinking or just standing creepily. On the plus side, Brytne said that my dancing was "not that bad," which is the best I could ever EVER hope for. One thing I do need to work on is my facial expression, because apparently I look more pissed off than should be humanly possible. This might explain why no one sits by me in class either. Sort of a weird defense mechanism, I suppose. They can't avoid me for being lame if I send them signals to avoid me. Stupid fucked up psychology. Also, Will looked pimp, and you cannot argue with me here.

We left after 1:30 and then hit Baskin-Robbins because that's all I want ever. Came home and Brytne and I tried to watch Spinal Tap again, but first she, then I, conked out, so so much for that. I guess I could give it another shot today, but... no.