09/11/2003 - 10:41 p.m. | nudity and theft once again solve my problems

So, I had to shower, right? So there was gonna be like a ten minute window when I wouldn't be able to hear the cable company person if they came. But what are the odds, he asks, completely forgetting about his superior streak of karma thus far. I get out of the tub mid-"The High Party"-screaming and notice a message. Shoot - it's the cable company and they left roughly 2 minutes earlier. So, shirtless and drippy, I sprint downstairs and get the attention of the guy just as he's getting into his van. "Hey, man! I'm here! For the cable!" Nice. Then I quickly run upstairs to put a God damned shirt on.

Guy: Someone likes Avril Lavigne a lot, huh?
Me: Nah, it was mostly meant as a joke.
Guy: Awful lot of posters for just a joke.

Somehow, he has made a point. Anyway, it looks like I've got the internet, kids! Now we've just got to divvy it up, cancel shit ethernet, and we're set to go. Additionally, TV!! Didn't have to be an ass and go bother Shelly and watch TV at her place. I was allowed to let the ultra-tan Peter Jennings rattle his nonsense from the comfort of my own home.

Finished my journalism shit (with a break or two for fried foods with Kyle), and then we went out on a mission to steal my bike back. After a long interlude at his parents' place, we got the bolt cutters and some oil and got on our way. Wolverines! (Do you know what this is a reference from? I do, because I have IMDB again!!). After a few attempts to oil/burn the lock, Kyle thrashed the hell out of it with the bolt cutters until it gave (totally monstrous) while Brytne and I tried to explain to passerby that this really is my bike because no one would be stupid enough to steal this piece of shit on a Thursday night at 8:30 pm. Reminder: Buy non-cheap lock next time. Thank you.

Came home and did my very best to finish my econ, but it took a while because of both inner and outer distractions. Anyway, done now, and free to waste the night away. Sleeping or something.

I've grown way too used to not having the internet. I don't like the idea of people being able to contact me with such nonchalance. IMs really are too relaxed. Where's the focus there? I want people to either mean it or leave me alone. Wow, I am a total hermit. I mean, this is not that I dislike any of you... just... it doesn't feel right to have such free contact with people. I've gotten too used to being alone. So, uh, maybe don't expect me online much... because it kind of makes me feel vulnerable. Then again, Michelle just called me in the middle of her goin' out or whatever to see if I wanted to look for more care repair places tomorrow, and that confuses me even more. Why would someone call right then about something so tiny? It doesn't make sense. But! How often do I make sense? 12. That's how often.

Oh, my hair is so manageable!

I think instead of being a lobster for Halloween, I want to be The Invincible Talking Crab. Very few modifications will need to be made. In both of the two Francine Pascal books that I have read, she uses the word "erection" exactly once. I must see if she goes for a third. In the meantime, I think I am hearing way too much sound emitting from behind Spritz's door, and that's fucking creepy as hell. As hell. God really did me a favor making me repulsive to girls. Thank you, God.

I can't believe that it's already Friday. Where does my time go? Shitter? Quite right. Anyway, if I could do anything right now, I think I'd want to go out and eat somewhere with a bunch of friends. Perkins maybe, it doesn't really matter. That's just kind of what I'm jonesin' for, and it ain't gonna happen. I ride my bike until my legs hurt, and then I ride a little longer. This takes me deeper and deeper into Urbana, which eventually just becomes a cute little town. I'm annoyed with how fast I cover ground, though. I went down this one really dark, quiet street and thought, "Man, if I were ever going to be sexually assaulted, this is the road it would happen on." I have happy thoughts.