07/01/2003 - 10:39 p.m. | many irons in the fire

There is this list of things I continually mean to do (besides Kyle�s, which I am even more hopeless behind on), but I never seem to get around to. I should be making strides now, but I feel like writing this more. Yay, you. No good deed goes unpunished. When my parents asked if Lisa and I were OK, I said, �Last time we talked, we were� but she could have become somehow enraged at me again for something I did indirectly.� I am fucking clairvoyant. Not that I don�t deserve it maybe, but my gift for timing is excellent. Also this headache. I don�t think I rose to the occasion, however. I�m sure that was disappointing, which is what I was going for. Amazing. It makes a lot more sense to have Lisa as an adversary than as a friend. She�ll catch on.

Hours: 8 (7-3)
$$$: $85.75
CDs:
-�Girlfriend� � Matthew Sweet
-�Hail to the Thief� � Radiohead
-�Too Far to Care� � Old 97�s
-�Emergency & I� � Dismemberment Plan
-Random MP3s � The Dakota Smith

Struggle through a headache to write this. Yes, I will. And after this econ homework and paper animals, assuming I have the energy, which I never do. Fart. When I wake up early (not necessarily when I don�t get much sleep), I stay in this fog for a really long time. I woke up at 6 today, got ready, rode to work, welded for four hours, doing my usual singing, thinking, whatever, and I still wasn�t really wide awake until after 12. The morning was spent in this weird floaty state. I mean, I functioned well enough, but nothing was in focus� like my body was still expecting me to crawl back into bed any minute. Poor thing, screwed again. Just another day of consistent welding. Doughboy remains useless; he takes so many breaks and just kind of hobbles around. Where is your dignity, man? Snake King was hassling me about the, uh, 4 tomato pens the machine (not Nate, the machine) screwed up. �Gotta listen for it!� Oh, just die. They weren�t even completely ruined; he was annoyed I cut them down into the pile for smaller pens. And everyone steals my pens off the racks, and it ticks me off. No appreciation, these people. And my bread was seven grain or something today, and one of those grains was weird. Chewy or something. Dad came late (well, late in my book) and then we went to the Mexican grocery store so he could finish his last stop. From there, we looked for cars.

So many cars. Tried a Daytona, which was adorable, but clunky and noisy. Then a Spirit, which is exactly the same as a Daytona (same engine, same air conditioner problem), except with an old woman�s frame. Contemplated a hearse or an old police car. Just piles and piles of cars, and each one has a different way of getting the key out. Life is difficult. At the Sheridan car lot, we tried out this maroon Oldsmobile station wagon. �95 and smooth as butter. Bigger than I am used to, but roomy and nice. Cute little fold out seat in the back. So we got it! Well, we�re in the process of getting it. Down payment made, more to come. It�s more expensive than we had planned on, but it�s a pretty nice car considering. Best we drove. I�m excited! Might even come down to school at some point. I would like to come down to school at some point, but Kyle says maybe not �til Friday morning. Icky. I will give him extra money for Thursday afternoon.

�I look around, and all I see is destruction.�

Came home, drank Ovaltine, listened to Dave and the BoDeans. Took forever to decide on dinner. Dad and I eventually decided to go get food from the Norway Store. Unfortunately, the restaurant was closed. Susan Whalen was there, though. Ha. She seemed happy to see me. I didn�t quite have the guts to mention the phone number, but I might stop by before class tomorrow just in case. Social experiments are amusing, if not always successful. Also, never accept an apology. So, Norway Store closed, Dad and I headed to the Chinese food place. It was deserted. Got take out and headed home. I ate almost an entire carton of fried rice. I am disgusting. Talked with parents out on the patio for a while, then came inside, finished off some letters for the mail, and here I am. Considerably less than I wanted to do, but there�s still time. More painkillers. I think �misguided� is a cool word. Like, misguided thoughts. Good imagery.