03/03/2003 - 4:36 p.m. | so it's come to this

Heh - um... without really thinking about it, I sorta just made an appointment with the McKinley Mental Health department. It's not 'til the 31st (very reassuring if I had a dire problem), so I've got some time, but uhh... yeah. That was weird. I dunno - it'd be nice to think there was some sort of quick fix cure for... whatever I have... but I figure since the resources are at hand, I might as well look into them. I mean, I'm not seriously fucked up; just working on a little self-improvement. Also rationalizing. I'm just sick and tired of being paranoid and having low self-esteem. Cram some Paxil down my throat and make me normal. Fuckers. I guess I feel a little guilty because I've been raised in a society that thinks that only crazies need this sort of help, but I'm not letting fear get in the way.

hehe - I wonder if I sounded too happy on the phone! "Hi! Can I make an appointment!!" "For what?" "Anxiety and maybe a little depression!!" Uhhh...