06/07/2005 - 1:14 a.m. | i kissed a drunk girl

SOMETHING CORPORATE OH FUCK YES! WOOOOO!

My boss at the cookie place is apparently part of the Hot Topic jetset music scene, so we were rocking out some hardcore tonight. I feel like such a tool with my black hair and matching Chuck Taylors. Some serious changes will have to be instigated.

I need to make a shirt or button or something that says "KILL THE MESSENGER" because that's sure as fuck what everyone does anyway. I drove through another insane web of creepy married person dormitories to drop off your six cookies or whatever, lady. I'm sorry you don't know how to use your computer, but I still don't have your two bottles of milk. I even paid the cunt the $4 for it out of my own pocket so she'd shut up, and she still wrote a bitchy e-mail to the boss. Not that she gave a flying fuck when she got it, though, so ha! Fuck you, dirtbag!

It was my last day of crossing the guard for a while. *sigh* The kids only had an hour of class today, so I sat under a shade tree and wrote on my laptop, which all in all was pretty fucking sweet. And now no reason at all to wake up before the afternoon :( My standards in the job hunt are getting ridiculously low. I was reading the want ads, and I was all like, "Hell yes I could be a Merry Maid!" Right now I'm shooting for more city jobs, maybe as a parking meter bitch. 40 hours a week of people despising my very existence? Yes, that sounds right up alley.

I had some Indian food the other day. "Lamb Aloo Ghost" You could really taste the ghost. I wanted to make "Where's the beef?" jokes, but I decided that would be tasteless. Speaking of, do they only have one spice in India, because everything tastes like varying amounts of curry spice. Smelly motherfuckers. Goes good with a nice PEPSI, though! Ahhhh... Pepsi!

[

ahhhhhhhhhh i am rife with sin!

Is this the side effect of the boredom? All I want to do is get laid by someone who is not my girlfriend, get trashed, go buy some weed (I don't even have anything to smoke it with what the fuck), get out there and start doing something. Spend money I don't have on things I don't need, destroy, go to the stripclub, make friends with some trailer trash. Get my face lacerated.

]

God damn it, Hobie!

My weird little social web continues to surprise me. Noted author John Grisham (aka Ace the gay fellow I keep working with) is apparently roommates with Matt Vroom, of the antisemitic cartoon strip "I Hate Pam!" I like learning about everyone else's weird little lives, John all getting his stomach pumped last weekend, Vroom welding his bumper back onto his car at 8 in the morning, shit, man, I did not get much sleep, and it's starting to wear away at my writing. But it's fine, OK?

It occurs to me that I have not been in a comfortable temperature for some time now. I've gone from my room to outside to my car to work and back, and they're. all. hot. And yet... somehow... I enjoy this.

I've got myself nicely deluded that the girls are making multiple visits to the store or multiple calls for deliveries, not for the sweet chocolatey goodness, but for another glimpse of the old Nate ass. Maybe they aren't the cream of the crop, but they have breasts and parts that I can focus on, unlike that beast from the other night... Besides, I'm so critical of female aesthetics that no one could get by unscathed. THE SCRUTINY! Anyway, I'm thinkin' they want the other Tasti D'Lite we have to offer, you know what I'm sayin'?

Good, now explain it to me. I have been doing some "Eyes Open Hypnosis (While You Read!)" for "Total Self-Confidence." Maybe this is just the first step!

Smacko is definitely single then. I am excited about trying to get him some sluts, theory being that I will get any horrible trickle down that he rejects. However, how can I gently let him now that he needs to get rid of those fucking bangs right fucking now? We need to queer eye his ass.

This is a shitty, confusing entry. I blame Something Corporate some more.