03/14/2005 - 2:21 a.m. | break it off like a bumblebee

I'd just as soon not think about tomorrow, but here goes. 1) Must attend stupid P.R. class. Must. I hate when things are musts. 2) Have face test in Community Psych. Stupid neo-hippie teacher is trying to make our class more like a community. How? By testing us on photocopied pictures of everyone in the class. I'm trying to harnass my skills as best I'm able. For each person, I've more or less come up with an insulting nickname about one of their characteristics. Then, I stick their real name on the end as the surname. Example? Zombiecat McRebecca. 3) Have 2 page paper to write about the organizational systems used in the the job I plan to hold after college due at 5. The easy out here would be to write about McDonalds or something with a very clear infastructure. Plus, it would tie in with my handy idea that I am fucked in about a year and a quarter. Heh - the last entry reeked of mortality, didn't it? I can't help - I get all thinking about death when I'm getting my slant on. 4) Work. I made $20 for the University of Illinois today, so maybe I'm not as gung ho as I would like to be. I get to wear a green shirt and show off my team spirit, though!

I'm trying to think about the rest of this weekend, and it occurs to me that a good portion of this diary exists to archive what shit Smacko does. Maybe I should retitle it as such. On Friday night, he came over and we drank and watched The Sandlot. He kept calling me "Negro Joe" for some reason, and that makes me laugh every time, so then he would do it even more as I was trying to sip my wine. "Oh yeah, you're lovin' that wine, aren't you, Negro Joe?" We also discussed the upcoming Old 97's concerts (May 6 and 7 - St. Louis and Chicago, respectively!!!) and how the posters we make this time around should be just a little bit homoerotic. Rhett Miller's real name is Stewart Ransom Miller, but Smacko suggested we make signs saying "Stewart Handsome Miller," and I think it's about the greatest thing ever. And then somehow I was really trashed. I think because I mysteriously consumer an extra bottle of Boone's Farm without realizing it at all. We went to Brytne's for Kate's birthday party, and it was more or less pretty terrible, as are all parties where it is not so dense with people that I cannot see move or breathe, only dance. We got Kyle to come - granted, he came with the mindset that he would drink every drop of alcohol they had, but he was there! Emily and her new girlfriend kept making out, and we were all silently absorbed in that. I don't know why I'm so paranoid, but I'm all worried for Emily that this chick is just experimenting, and then she'll all break Emily's heart. I don't even know either of them, but still I worry.

I woke up next day pretty hungover but consumer half a gallon of warm apple juice I've had lying around the last few days (It was apple juice, correct?) and eventually got functional enough to go downstairs and watch cartoons. Kyle, Smacko, and I hit up Taffies next for some catfish and then headed towards Wal-mart so as to buy Left Behind 2. Along the way, however, on Green and Lincoln or thereabout, we saw this SUV with this huge ass yellow ribbon on it with this crazy heart apple symbol and a lightning bolt on it, and the chase was on. Kyle repeated "I got this" and "Be cool" ad nauseum while we tried not to slit our throats to the Mo' Money soundtrack. Luckily, the bastard seemed to be heading somewhat towards our destination, so we launched Smacko out at him who leapt back in the car with the door still open as we took off into the night. Wal-mart did not have the movie, unfortunately, or if it did, it was buried far too deep in the $5.50 movie pit of horror. Plenty of copies of Futureshock, however. And Judgment, which is like Left Behind with Mr. T in the place of Kirk Cameron. It would have done the job, I guess, but I was feeling particularly dedicated, especially after that evening where I had to reexplain every scene in the movie as Kitty and Andy and Kyle yelled over it. And I forgot to buy a bicycle tire tube.

Bitch, bitch.