11/22/2003 - 2:21 p.m. | ...long-stemmed rose and cash in the other

Fuck! Some kid just poked his or her sibling in the eye here at Freer, and the poked is screaming bloody murder. Like everything about me, my patience is thin.

Lately, I've been trying to take my time and concentrate it such that it is filled almost entirely with things I enjoy doing. Perhaps this sounds hedonistic. Perhaps you're right. But it's not as though I have extravagant pleasures; I like candy and reading (about interesting things) and music and dancing and laughing. Those aren't terrible sins, right?

Spritz and I went on an adventure on Lincoln yesterday... north of the 74 exit! This is comparable to the Far East for us, so we were understandably scared. Two minutes later, we arrived at the UPS, dropped off his package, and were back on our way home again. Yay for anticlimax. Near the UPS building I noticed this steep sort of half-mountain thing that I suggested we climb. And Spritz agreed - with the coming of warmer weather. We have some training to do, so I guess we'll need to tip the couch on its side. All of this assuming we still remember by April.

After hours and hours of play, I finally saw somemthing in "Silent Hill" that really creeped me out. I wouldn't want to ruin it for you, though. Just go to the Hospital and look around for the room with the mirror. Meanwhile, I really hope I can find the previous game because from what I can tell, this Pyramid Head guy is the scariest thing in the entire world.

I gave myself all of ten minutes to prepare my psych assignment before I had to go over to Dank's to watch "American Idol." Unfortunately, I get a little too involved in some of my searches and start reading excessively. See? I'm not a total slacker! I like to learn; I just don't like class. It's like, dunno, Learning for Dummies or whatever. Well, in the case of my current classes anyway.

Dank and I already have some well-established habits that would probably confuse and/or frighten outsiders. Outsiders like the awkward nerd manfriend Kay brought over. Nice sweater, incidentally. Remember the movie Multiplicity where Michael Keaton had himself cloned but then the clones made clones and they were sort of retarded? Yeah, this guy was like Dank Clone to the 7th. Confusion just fills the air. Ask around. We played some DDR Max 2 (!!!) for a while after that. I'm pretty rusty, but it's good to see my instincts haven't completely shriveled up.

I went home fully intent on listening to some Kylie Minogue, but it kind of got washed up. Had to do psych firstly, and I am apparently unable to think when music is present. According to this one article I read, sleep deprivation is actually supposed to relieve the symptoms of depression, which makes me wonder why I was so sad all of last year. They say the best thing to do is to combine with deprivation with meds. I guess I just knew that inherently. I meant to listen to Kylie then, but I was sucked back into "Silent Hill," and we all know how well techno beats go with horror games.

I actually went to bed fairly early, which is supposed to be the worst thing you can do for depression. And it's all prolly in my head, but I was a little teensy bit down this morning. I dunno how to explain it; I am fairly happy, and I have some good friends, and I do things I like, but it just feels like I'm missing something. I honestly wish I had someone to go out with more. Not to get smashed or find some chix or whatever... I just like being in crowded places. Helps me think. And it just doesn't work out... Kyle has Brytne, and Spritz has UO, and Dank has no desire to do anything of the sort, and I'm still very shy about meeting new friends.

I guess that is one way in which I do really envy Spritz. He makes friends very easily, and he's well-liked, and they're always inviting him places. And sometimes I just sort of tag along, and I try to be innoculous so that no one is annoyed, but maintaining relationships is hard for me. Even after everything, I still don't feel like I have anything important to talk about. And unlike everyone else, I guess, I make the choice not to talk then. And these are kinks that I just do not know how tot get around. Anxiety is one thing, so's depression. But this one is very deep-rooted.

Anyway, so - I've been trying very hard to think up money making schemes, all right? (Speaking of, tomorrow I have a job interview for the crossing guard position! Do I wear a tie? NO!) And the hard part is you have to give something to the people that they want, that they would put some money value on, that will meanwhile cost yourself very little in time or energy. I should mention at this point that I have been reading about hypnosis, and I think I have a a pretty decent voice for it. So, last night I decided that I am going to try and make some hypnosis CDs and sell them on ebay. Here's what I'll do: I've looked up hypnosis on ebay to see what are the most popular subjects. As far as I can tell, we have "confidence with women" and "penis growth." So, I've got the basic tools already - the relaxation techniques and whatever - and I just have to come up with some OK sounding suggestions that I can stick in the middle there. Pop them on a CD, and put them up for bid, undercutting the price of the current fellow who seems to have most of the auctions up. $2 tops to burn, post, and ship each CD, and if I can get $10 or so apiece, we're turning a kickass profit. I've gotten devious in my desperation. I'm looking into plasma donations soon, and I also think I'm going to call about this novelist's assistant position. Hmm. Too bad we already signed on the house 'cause Old Man Europa is looking for new RA's for the coming year. Eliminating rent and bills would be more than a little nice. Scheisster. Or however one spells that.

Just another day that cements the fact that class is stupid and redundant, and that I should either stop reading the books or going to class, and both cost money so I dunno which. "Hello, here is exactly what the books says, except that instead of reading it in twenty minutes, you get to hear me say it for fifty." Thanks so much, love. My crazy pen just won't run out of ink; it's become this battle for dominance. Meanwhile, in AbPsych, I just pray for our little group discussion things so that I can influence our group to do the wrong thing. Today, we were learning about categories of mental disorders, and we were supposed to come up with categories to put movies in, and EVERYONE else did genres, but I suggested we do Good/Bad, making for a much more hilarious time for all (although not as good of a time as my theoretical Movies With Morgan Freeman/Movies Without Morgan Freeman backup plan). Dank and I may be attempting to take an Introduction to Costume Design class a little later on in the semester. Wish us luck. Fondly.

A wet girl wearing only a towel just walked up, and I handed her a big pair of boltcutters. This is the weirdest job ever.

I have a feeling I am going to be seeing a lot of bad, bad movies this weekend, so if you would like to see Lost in Translation with me on Saturday night at 7, you definitely should let me know. $2 @ 112 Greg! Fun for all!